I am so excited to introduce you all to another awesome blogger today! Her name is Lori and she blogs over at Everyday Truth. I absolutely LOVE reading Lori’s posts. Her girls are several years older than both of my kiddos, so I really enjoy learning from her experiences with her older kids, as she faces experiences I hadn’t even thought of. I have been so encouraged by reading this post she wrote for us today, it is one that I know I will need to read and use as a reminder again and again. I hope it encourages your heart as well! — Paula
I sit in my chair with a book on my lap, not reading, not even trying to read. My brain wanders back over the day.
My 11-year-old came home from school with a failed math test, and I think, “I could have helped her
My 9-year-old was frustrated with not getting enough attention and chose to get in trouble, after which
I drug her out on the back porch and yelled at her, and I think, “I could have handled that better.”
My husband was frustrated with my older daughter’s inability to grasp her math homework, so I
intervened, and I think, “I could have loved them both better.”
Some days, it seems the drama just won’t end. When we sit down at the end of the day and our minds
wander over the events of the day, we see so many places where we think, “I could have done better.”
And we could have. But we didn’t.
In that moment, we have two choices: we can beat ourselves up over our failures or we can learn from
our mistakes, ask forgiveness, and rely on God to help us do better the next time.
Too often, we moms choose the first option. We blame ourselves for every little thing our kids do
wrong. We beat ourselves up for failed math tests, grumpy husbands and acting-out children. And we
refuse to let it go. We think every little mistake we make is going to drastically affect our children’s
You know what? That first choice is a lie. We all fail. Every single one of us. We all have days when we’re not the best we can be. We may not even be mediocre. We simply fail.
But you know what our kids will remember about our failures? They won’t remember most of the
details, but they will remember what we did when we failed. They’ll remember if our reaction was to
beat ourselves up or if our reaction was to learn from our mistakes because they are learning to deal
with their own failures from the way we deal with ours.
I don’t know about you, but I want my kids not to get stuck on their mistakes but to learn to dust
themselves off, ask for forgiveness and jump back in the game. I want their mistakes to be bumps on the
road, not pits to wallow in. And they learn that from me.
So, the next time I have a day where I think, “I could have done better,” I’m going to figure out what
went wrong, learn from it, ask for forgiveness, and ask God to give me the wisdom and the strength to
do a better job the next time.
Because our kids are learning — even from our failures.
Lori Fairchild is the mom of two daughters, ages 9 and 11. When she’s not at the hockey rink or the soccer field with her girls, you’ll find her blogging at Everyday Truth, where she talks about the ways we can teach our kids about God in the everyday moments of life. She has also written the e-book Everyday Christmas, a 25-day devotional that will help keep Jesus at the center of your family’s Christmas celebrations.
Looking for more posts in the “confessions of an imperfect mother” series? Click on the button below to find all the posts!
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