“The reason we struggle with insecurity
is because we compare our behind – the – scenes
with every one else’s highlight reel.” – Steven Furtick
This post has stood out in my mind from the moment I first read it on pinterest. I believe these words could be applied to many people, in many different stages of life, but they are especially accurate for mothers. We all want to be the best moms that we possibly can, and because of that it is all too easy for us to get sucked in to the “mommy wars” that are so prevalent online, or on a more personal level get stuck in a motherhood competition between friends as each mom silently (or not so silently?) endeavors to have the “best” kids and the “best” method(s) of child rearing.
Personally, I struggle with trying to be the “perfect” mom. I really want people to look at my kids and think that they are the most perfect little darlings in the world. It is a pride issue (and I’m working on it) but most of all it is an insecurity issue. I am definitely guilty of comparing my behind the scenes to every one else’s highlights (as the quote states). But the reality is, I’m not perfect. I’m not a perfect mother, and I never will be. None of us are, and thankfully, that’s okay :) Our kids don’t need us to be perfect, they need us to love them, teach them and raise them up in the fear of the Lord. None of those things require perfection. In fact, they mostly just require grace and strength from God.
As I was thinking about all this, I decided to do something new on my blog. I’m starting a series. In the coming weeks, months and maybe even years I will be sharing some of my ‘behind the scenes’ with you, and enlisting the help of some awesome guest bloggers to help me with these confessions as well!
It is easy to read mom-blogs and feel discouraged because the blogger seems to have it all together. Most would be quick to let you know that is not the case, but honestly, it’s much easier to share our success than it is to share our failures. And while it is very helpful to read about things that work for another family, it is also helpful to hear what didn’t work, and to know that if you are struggling, you are not alone.
my hope is that this series will be an encouragement to you. If you are having one of “those” days, come by and be reminded that we all have tough days, and that God gives us grace to face them and strength to get through them. You don’t have to be a perfect mommy. Perfection should never be our focus, but instead our goal should be to glorify God through motherhood by loving our kids and seeking to share Christ with them in every day things.
So there is the heart and the reasoning behind these “confessions”. Feel free to join me in the comments with your own confessions! No judgement here. (and no perfect moms either!) Just a lot of women who are together learning to not be ashamed of their imperfection.
Here are quick links to all the posts in the Confessions of an imperfect mother series so far:
#1 – The post you just read is #1
#2 – Tv dinners
#3 – I’m not enjoying every minute
#4 – spices and the point
#5 – When you are not thrilled to be pregnant
#6 – One of those days
#7 – Hiding
#8 – Sleepy
#9 – spoiled milk
#10 – Stairs
# 11 – This (having 2 kids) is HARD
#12 – Comparing our kids
#13 – Smiling while your kid misbehaves
#14 – Pride and Prejudice guest post from Karina @ Grace for that
#15 – I’d rather be cleaning guest post from Allie @ the purposeful housewife
#16 – I fail daily – guest post from Lori @ Everyday Truth
#17 – Discontent
#1 – The post you just read is #1
#2 – Tv dinners
#3 – I’m not enjoying every minute
#4 – spices and the point
#5 – When you are not thrilled to be pregnant
#6 – One of those days
#7 – Hiding
#8 – Sleepy
#9 – spoiled milk
#10 – Stairs
# 11 – This (having 2 kids) is HARD
#12 – Comparing our kids
#13 – Smiling while your kid misbehaves
#14 – Pride and Prejudice guest post from Karina @ Grace for that
#15 – I’d rather be cleaning guest post from Allie @ the purposeful housewife
#16 – I fail daily – guest post from Lori @ Everyday Truth
#17 – Discontent
#18 – Missed Opportunities – 5 minute friday post
#19 – My Love/hate relationship with nursing
I hope you are having as much fun with this series as I am! I’m a firm believer that it is good and healthy to laugh at yourself, learning to laugh at my mistakes has been huge step for me, and I’m slowly placing a lot less pressure on myself to be (and appear) perfect. Thanks for joining me on this wild, wonderful, imperfect ride of motherhood!
ells says
oh that quote is sooo true…the deadly comparison game…we are all imperfect mommas…always good to live true and laugh a lot…blessings~
Naomi says
Motherhood is definitely a journey of growth and complete trust in God. Its a wonderful comfort that He is faithful and will always walk this journey with us. Thank you for your openness here and for linking up at Monday’s Musings. Blessings to you. :o)
Denise says
May you be sweetly blessed on your continued journey.
Kate @ Teaching What Is Good says
I love the transparency of this post! None of us are perfect, that’s for sure. But too often in the church, we feel the need to hide this truth and put on our Christian Mask instead – and this includes the image of Perfect Mom. But God is glorified by our weaknesses when we seek to walk in HIS power and strength.
I’m looking forward to more in this series as an encouragement for all of us to be more real in our lives with one another. Thanks for linking up!
Messy Marriage says
Comparisons are a bad habit I’ve been trying to break too. It’s such a trap that really distorts reality and my feelings. I’m right there with you on this one! Thanks for your wise thoughts and quotes.
Anonymous says
As long as you do your best that is all that matters =) You have tons of love to go around so I would not worry so much about being so perfect! I do not mean this bad in any way. You seem to be doing a good job. Just focus on now and the present and don’t worry so much about being perfect.
futurehope says
thanks anonymous! that is actually the purpose of this series, to remind myself, and my readers that no mama is perfect, and to focus less on perfection and more on loving and caring for the family in the best way that each of us can <3