Are you just a mom?
It’s a question that is asked, and implied frequently in our society. “So…what do you do? Are you just a mom?”
Well, that depends on what you mean by just.
Do you mean just my child’s first friend and first kisses.
Do you mean just the cook and the maid. The nutrition specialist for our home and the one that budgets for groceries. Financial expert, budget guru and even sometimes, coupon-er.
The one that kisses bo-bos 1,000 times until they feel better. The live-in nurse that manages more than just kisses, but medicines and dr appointments as well.
Maybe you are talking about the teacher, the one that explains life to them, and listens when they just need to talk. The one that taught them the alphabet, along with bigger things like manners, rules and consequences. I may not be a homeschool mom, but I am still a teacher, each and every moment that my children are awake, even when I don’t even realize that I’m teaching.
The one that gets asked more questions that google in any given hour and provides the best answers that she can, so that the kids can have a better view of life, and more knowledge of the things they see around them.
The one that’s up all night with the baby, and all day with the toddler.
The midnight chorus that sings them to sleep again, and the strong arms that hold them, even when too weary to hold herself.
The one that sacrifices her own time, for the needs of ones far smaller than herself.
The one that worries far more than she should, and feels far less capable than she is.
The one that does all these things and is still expected to have a social life, wear fancy clothing and never, ever frown or have a bad day.
The one that’s criticized for not doing enough if she doesn’t work, and scorned for doing too much if she does.
I do other things yes, I work from home, and have adult friends. Motherhood is not the only thing that I do, is not the only thing that I am, but it is a large part of who I am as a woman, in every decision and action.
So sure, I guess you could say I’m just a mom but I wouldn’t change a thing.
Heather says
Love this girl!! I can’t tell you how much I relate to this post. I may be just a mama but I’m proud to be one :)
heather @ http://likeamorningcupofcoffee.blogspot.com/
Debbie @ Deliciously Inspired says
Speaking as a grandmother now – your post was perfect. I didn’t go back to work until my oldest was in high school and we needed a steady income to pay for college. When I would be asked – “What do you do?” I used to say I had the privilege to stay home with my children and my being home was my part of my husband and my partnership. There is no way my husband could have travelled like he needed to for his job had I been in the work environment. In the past 10 years I have had many conversations with career women who looking back wish they had stayed home with their children. We never went on fancy yearly vacations and found our fun in inexpensive ways but I feel blessed to have been able to be a stay-at-home mamma and kiss all those boo boos.
Gabrielle says
Love this! I remember going to my high school reunion where I would talk with the very same people who had voted me Most Likely to Succeed. I decided that I wouldn’t be uppity about degrees earned, but instead, I would say I’m “just a mom” and let them fill in the blanks. As a result, I had fun talking about motherhood things instead of a career that I no longer have. It was an interesting identity shift for me.